The dating landscape changes with the times. And with our world increasingly becoming dependent on doing things quickly, remotely, and casually, dating is losing its soul. The best way to change that is to bring back the old school way of dating. Though, if you check any other Asian dating website, they encourage their followers to roll with the times and to swim with the tide.
So set yourself apart. Using the classic approach to dating will work for both parties. It can filter out anyone who isn’t willing to make an effort to go out with you. Also, it makes you memorable.
Here is a list of things we need to start doing (or hoping for) again.
Pick up your date at their place
Nothing is further from being romantic than getting a message with “Here.” Meeting halfway is considered to be more casual. But if you are serious about dating, shouldn’t you find ways to go the distance? Step out of the car and knock on their door. It’s a small gesture, but it gives the date more meaning.
Dress to the nines (or as close to it as possible)
Dressing well is subjective. What is nice for one person might be overdressed for another. So, instead of thinking of it as what (or who) you’re wearing, think of it as the amount of effort you’re putting into it. You don’t have to wear a suit or a cocktail dress, but wanting to look your best counts. Don’t aim for looking really good. Sometimes looking presentable is enough to let the other person know that this is something you are taking seriously.
Bring a small gift on the first date
It could be flowers, a book you know they like, or a mixtape. It can be anything. And it’s not limited to girls receiving it. People have downplayed this practice, effectively lowering the standards of dating. There is nothing wrong with letting your date know that you appreciate who they are and the time you will be spending with them.
Focus on your date
Turn off your phone, or at least put it on silent. Your date is there with you. Give them the time that they’re giving you. If you really wanted to talk to someone else during that date, then you’re better off going out with that person instead.
Plus, it’s rude.
Define what you are doing
Nowadays, people are just “hanging out” or “just talking” even though they see each other on a regular basis and do things that are essentially dating. In the long run, all this doublespeak causes miscommunication and even false expectations. We use labels like this to avoid putting ourselves out there and the inevitable (only in our mind) rejection. No matter how much you spin it, it’s courtship, and you have to let it be known. Take a risk and the other person will make their feelings known. If they reply in the negative, you saved yourself time and additional heartache in the long run.
Defining the relationship
Another aspect of dating that people muddle with complex and aversion-friendly terms is defining the relationship. Being stuck in relationship limbo is never fun. Do yourself and your partner a favor: make it happen.
Never assume that you can monopolize a person’s time. Never assume that just because you’ve been on a few dates, you can be physically closer. From asking for their time, from wanting to kiss them, to even having sex. Always ask for permission. It shows that you respect them, and you need consent.
Nothing is sexier than consent.
Dating traditions, like great music, are classics for a reason. They demonstrate value and respect. Knowing one is valued and respected goes a long way in dating. There’s nothing really wrong with the advice given by other Asian dating sites but mixing it up with classic moves might help you give your dates more meaning.